Over 20 years ago, a small sized book took the nation by storm, attempting to transform the way we as human beings see the world. With currently over 25 million copies in print, Don't Sweat the Small Stuff truly enveloped the notion:
If it won't matter in 5 years, don't give it 5 seconds.
This is one of my personal life mantras. In fact, every time I feel myself starting to get upset, I always try (emphasis on try, I am only human and don't always succeed) to stop the crazy train and ask myself, "Will this matter in 5 years?"
You will be shocked, how often the answer is no. Yet, many of us get sucked into the pool of despair regardless. We fall down that rabbit hole of self-imposed depression and before we know it we are crying about the time we fell off our chairs in kindergarten and the teacher used us as examples instead of seeing if we are okay (true story).
Sometimes, but not often, the answer is yes. This WILL matter in 5 years. Perhaps it is a death, a divorce, a job loss, a sickness, a disability, and THOSE are where we need to use our energy.
The truth is we only have so much energy. If you really think about it, you know it's true. We have all felt depleted at various points in our lives, usually from excessive stress or even trauma. Regardless, we run out. I always describe it as a cup. When my cup is full, I can freely pour into others as much as I want or as much as they need. When my cup is empty, I have nothing left to give and nothing for myself.
When we pour and pour and pour into situations that we should not be giving 5 seconds too, we find our cup frequently dry. And then when the true hardships happen, the ones that WILL matter in 5 years, we find ourselves barren and unable to cope. We are, in essence, depleted.
What can we do? First, we can become cognizant of what we are choosing to pour into. You too can learn to stop the crazy train, and ask yourself will this matter in 5 years, if the answer is yes, by all means, pour away, if the answer is no, take a deep breath, shake it off, and redirect your thoughts and energy the best that you can!
Second, you can keep your cup full! I always talk about self-care. Find those things that refill your cup and practice them on a routine basis. I have heard many excuses as to why people do not engage in self-care. One is that they do not have time. Yes, you may have to creatively make time. I can promise you this, invest the time now, and you will have the ability to save all the time from the inevitable crash that comes with not practicing self-care. The second excuse I hear is that they cannot afford it. The only things that they enjoy cost too much. Again, you cannot afford not too. Figure out a new budget, figure out SOMETHING! Or try some things that are free! See if anything else works!! It is so worth it in the long run.
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