If you know me in real life, or if you took my Psychology of Learning class this past semester, you know that I have a major problem with jealousy and comparison. It is honestly one of my biggest, if not the biggest, weakness, I currently have (I have had many!). I have this huge tendency to notice and feel bad when people are thinner than me, smarter than me, more successful than me, and then go down this rabbit hole of feeling really badly about myself.
In the current situation of the world, meaning the current coronavirus pandemic, I see where this is an even bigger problem than usual. In fact it seems like everyone has some sort of jealousy. If you are an "essential" employee, you are probably feeling a little jealous of the people that get to stay safe in their homes and work in their pajamas. If you are working from home in your pajamas, you are probably experiencing some jealousy of those who get to go out and have human interaction, because God knows you are going stir crazy. If you got laid off, you are probably jealous of those that are still getting a paycheck. If you haven't received your stimulus check yet, or like me are having a huge issue getting your direct deposit information to the IRS, you are probably jealous of those that already received theirs. It seems there is much to be jealous about in this new world....
How do we confront this these tendencies? Considering that I have been battling the infamous green eyed monster for some time now, I would love to share what has worked for me!
1. Practice intentional gratitude. We all want to be more grateful, but few actually do it with intention. Every night I open a notes app on my phone, and "write down" 3 things that I am grateful for. It is the last thing I do at night. I don't check on Facebook or Instagram. I end the day on a happy note. The next morning, the first thing I do is read those 3 things, and I set a positive tone for the day.
2. See yourself and your situation the way others would. We are all guilty of letting our thoughts run away with themselves. Try to be self-aware and stop these thoughts. Reframe them. Think about how others would view your current situation. I promise it is not as bad as our thoughts let it seem.
3. When all else fails, communicate! It;s funny how often I am jealous of someone and they are just as jealous of me! We end up sharing a laugh and increase the value of our human connection It's OK to feel bad, we all feel bad right now. But, please, keep yourself as healthy as possible and don't hold it in!
4. Listen to me speak live on this very topic! Thursday, April 23rd at 1:00 pm (CT). All pre-registrations are entered for a chance to win a signed copy of my book, "Choosing Happiness" You can register here: https://zoom.us/meeting/register/tJUrf-2trj4tHtayGtoEi2-WHjeF2hv3ZEJk Best part is that it is free!! :)
No one feels great during this time. It is ok to be sad and grieve the things you are missing. I hope that I can bring a little bit of joy back into your lives! Stay as happy as you can
my friends!
I love you, Dr. Chrissy. Your blog posts help me feel at ease and in a generally better mood. I’m proud to know you. You’re an inspiration to all.